The Emerald Lake Asylum is not a place most desire to go. Nineteen-year-old, Skylenna, however, made a promise that she must keep. Once hired, she only has one purpose—prove to the council that barbaric treatments, such as waterboarding, scalding baths, and beatings, are no longer the answer. But that all takes pause when she meets the source of terror in the asylum. A patient with a split personality—on one side, he’s the bloodthirsty genius, Dessin. On the other, a hidden persona that is buried deep in his subconscious.
When Dessin is caught in an attempted cell break, he faces execution if Skylenna can’t bring out his core personality and reveal his humanity. She has ninety days to save his life, and the only way to do that is to let him consume her into his world of moves, counter-moves, and master puppeteering.
With each passing day, their bond deepens, a forbidden attraction forming against her best judgments. Little by little, Skylenna uncovers the sinister secrets of his past that turned him into the monster everyone else fears. And Dessin proves to have one weakness despite the terrifying, indestructible persona he presents to the world: her.
Disclaimer: This book contains explicit content and dark elements and may be considered offensive to some readers. Check trigger warnings before reading. It is not intended for anyone under 18 years of age. Please store your files wisely, where they cannot be accessed by underage readers. This is the revised edition.
This is a dark dystopian society that is intended to be problematic. Please note that this is a fictional world and in no way reflects on the author’s personal beliefs. We will see the society grow and correct its moral compass over the series.
Triggers: gratuitous violence, depression, suicide, torture, domestic violence, eating disorders, hallucinations, misogyny, poisoning, sexual assault, rape, pedophilia, romanticized mental illness, gore, death of a loved one, child abuse, decapitation, female oppression, hostage situation, body shaming, panic attacks, emotional trauma, child sexual assault, child sex trafficking.
My Thoughts:
04.24.2024: I just finished book one and while I am raw as fuck, I am jumping headfirst into book two!
Starting off with a bang, we are still with Greystone!
Also note: Um I need to know when 'The fortress and the figurine' as well as 'The clock and The Carnival' is to come out!
Yea, we started off with learning more trauma, it is breaking me little by little, and especially since Greystone is so gentle, flirty, but sweet breaks me even more.
"When you're ready." The mysterious descendent of a water nymph says before leaving her to return to the treehouse. It turns out these people are called 'Naiadales' and I want to know all about them!
04.25.2024: Alrighty-Roo I am on page 123 chapter 16 and man oh man, I loved the first half of this book, it was amazing and intriguing, but now I am just so confused. So, bear with me, this is going to be so scattered as are my notes and my understanding of what is happening.
- My questions: (Warning there are so many)
1) Who the shit is 'The Nightamous Horde' [the spelling is most likely way off I do apologize] Here are the facts I have - that I wrote down - they are decedents of the dark elf's that used to inhabit the Evergreen Dark wood area. The one we are introduced to from the get-go is named Runa ("I am going to flick her." Skylenna) She is described to have sultry black eyes, pointed and elegant skin so white it's nearly transparent which show cases the blue veins under her flesh.
During their time here I encountered my first ick. "The Nightamous Horde is known for three things. First, being decedents of the dark elves. Second, we love to drink and lastly, but most importantly we love to fuck." Runa (page 34)
Which leads up to Skylenna saying "Yes, sir." on page 41.
Now, here is why I found these to be an ick, I am a prude and get bashful at crude straightforwardness (feel bad for my husband lol!)
Now, back to 'The Nightamous Horde' there Dessin and Skylenna is told they are a part of a Prophecy, but they don't give us jack shit about it due to magic binding their words. Anyways, they are given a map showing the seven forests and where each ancient colony is located, and the 'The Nightamous Horde' elders marked the ones they should focus on visiting. The second gift was a 'shade stone' which is something that you can rub in a time of need to summon the 'Shades' which were elves, fee and dwarves that were poisoned (I am not 100% clear on this one)
2) Who are the 'Crimson Kres'? I know they were from the red oak before they went missing after all the 'RottWeiler' were massacred.
3) WHO ARE THE 'SHADES' and HOW did they end up cursed or poisoned or whatever I NEED TO KNOW!
4) The 'Storm sages' who are they, and where did they come from? What the shit is a 'Snow elven wolf' and why are they linked to the 'Storm sages'? There was some explanation but not enough for me to really understand and relate/care for the group. Also, in this what in the heck does 'Dashna' mean? And why was the woman referring to Skylenna that way?
5) What in the devil is a 'God Alpha RottWeiler'? Is it leading us to DaiSzek is going to be the 'God Alpha RottWeiler'? And if so, does that mean there is a pack of RottWeiler somewhere waiting to be found?
Those are my questions thus far and I hoping that I will learn all of it further into the book or even in the third book.
Now as for my 'dislikes': (There are few, but they are minor things)
How can Skylenna say Dessin is like her brother, AFTER she grinded on his lap in front of everyone than letting Greystone get her off? And then to add on the very next page (pg. 111 to be exact) she is again grinding against his dick (well Kane's), and he is like Skylenna I recommend you stop; she is like mmm I am not going to do that so sorry. But she says she only looks at certain alters like a brother.
When she is eating in front of everyone while they are with the 'Storm sages' she freaks out and it is said it is because of her programing from her time in the Chandelier City. But it never happens any other time? That doesn't track for me.
Now on to other shit, because a whole lot of stuff has happened since they left the asylum. After finding the Demechnef defects camp and seeing everyone murdered/tortured they are attacked by the Demechnef soldiers waiting in the woods. Dessin and DaiSzek kill them all (but one) who is still hiding, Skylenna is gearing up to kill him but one of the snow elven wolves takes over. This is where they met Garanthian (the bear man). After all that they head out and Skylenna gets snagged in a trap where she cuts the shit out of her ankle before nearly getting attacked by a creature called an 'A sapphire mountain nadaskar' which is killed by DaiSzek.
So, Dessin carries Skylenna to a new place (further north) and they end up at Kane's childhood home - which Skylenna says she can see dried blood still on the curtains through the dusted window - They don't go inside and instead they hide out in the shed outback where Skylenna can rest and heal. This is where they come up with the brilliant plan to admit themselves into the Emerald Lake Asylum. All because they think Judas has some kind of information about them or the prophecy or whatever since he helped Dessin and Skylenna get closer as well as telling Dessin about Masten's intentions for Skylenna.
So, we are back at the asylum where Skylenna is getting man handled by her not so BFF Merdei. Some priest drugs the shit out of here because she is a possessed demon, and she starts seeing Scarlett. At one point she Merdei to stop her treatments and says she will do anything. Merdei gets a little uh funky about it and says some shit like will you be my little slave girl? Kiss my shoes slave girl. Like Merdei is unhinged in all sorts of ways. Anyways, Skylenna is stripped down to her underwear and bound to a wall while they chain up Dessin to the other wall, so he has a front row seat to Skylenna's whipping.
After she is whipped Merdei skips out leaving them there chained up and alone. But remember Dessin is a magician and uncuffs himself. He makes his way over to Skylenna who is still chained, bleeding and well not doing so hot. He thinks to himself, I know how to fix this - Oral sex. Um excuse me sir, I am all for the kink and whatever but damn dude your girl just got her ass handed to her.
But okay, since we are here already let's get after it. "His fingers glisten in the candlelight, soaking and he is only feeling me from the outside of my panties. I can't help but want to apologize. For what? I don't know. But my body is reacting in strange ways. Scarlett warned me this would happen. We leak between the legs." - Skylenna.
Again, I am a prude, so this sent me into an uncomfortable tizzy of blushing and saying, "Holy shit, holy shit." over and over again.
After he gets her off, he unchains her, and they fall asleep. The next morning Dessin starts telling her about all of the alters. So, let's refresh, we have met Kane (main) Greystone, and Dessin as well as some crazy pants who likes pain. The others are named, Foxem, Syfer, Kalidus, Dai, Aquarus.
Fun fact, Aquarus is described to be "a 'Fictional' alter. A god of the sea. He was split during the simulated drowning treatment. A god that couldn't drown. Could breathe underwater." I like it, and it makes some of the stuff in the first book make a whole lot more sense.
After, Skylenna is taken back to her room and convinces the priest to let her see Judas. When Judas comes by, he gives her a cryptic message basically stating in six months there is going to be a war, (I have so many questions) and then she and Dessin are taken to the hydrotherapy room for treatment. After they pop Skylenna's cherry and honestly, I skimmed lol, but here is what I did pick up and remember to note: {"Fuck Skylenna." And I'm free-falling into his glazed eyes, his sudden feral need to take me in one bite. He isn't thinking clearly, isn't in control anymore as he pushed himself to the hilt hard enough that his hand finds my mouth, stifling the scream that tears out of me.} - I need a fan.
Afterwards she wants to go back to her room and speak to the priest again, who brings her a letter from Judas here is what it says:
Skylenna,
They say when the Lord has given you a dream, it should not be ignored. Have you read the script from the bible - what book was it? Ruth. You should read the passage, "Your people shall be my people, and your God, my God." Must I be the only man God has chosen in this asylum to do his work? Leave it to me. I accept this responsibility. Will you let me know if He passes on other dreams? Find me if He does. You need only speak through one of God's children, the priest. Soon, please.
Judas
(And there's a symbol of a burning tree)
Dessin is able to decode it, an anagram, it turns out the letter was really telling Skylenna this: They have Ruth. You must leave. I will find you soon.
Poor Ruth I hope she doesn't die.
Dessin and Skylenna are able to flee the asylum and head for the bike Dessin had hide. "Holding on to Dessin, I wonder how this will end. Surely, he knows we can't run forever. What if... death is the only way out? We're fugitives. We don't get the chance at a peaceful life. And what if we are caught? What would happen to me? They want him. Not me. I'm deadweight. A liability. Would I be killed for my associations with him? No, Dessin would never let that happen."
So, while I understand her hesitation we have already been told she is Dessin and all the other alters weakness, so rather than kill her they would most likely use her to get what they want from Dessin especially if they know her pain is something Dessin wants to avoid at all costs.
They end up at Skylenna's childhood home where she doesn't wanna be. It brings out the worst memories and she wants to leave. Kane goes inside to find what Jack left for her as Skylenna understandably doesn't want to go inside.
'Kane and I don't need diamonds where we're going.
I sigh, using my index finger to push a few diamonds aside, mixing them with the green tint of emeralds. I hook my finger around a chain. A golden chain. Attached to something heavier and bigger that the gems piled up among each other. A circular gold piece. Two rings hanging on either side of the thick locket. Oh, it's a necklace.'
Inside the necklace is a black and white photo of her family, with the engraving "You will always have our love and our hearts." I am pretty sure my husband is tired of going to the store to pick up for tissues for me.
They are heading to the OG headquarters for the Demechnef headquarters. Dessin leaves Skylenna behind to head in and get Ruth. All the while Skylenna flips her shit and decides the best thing to do is start blowing shit up.
"Soon enough, it sounds like a war of good and evil is erupting behind me. Like fireworks and grenades collaborated at the same party. And when I turn around, I am standing upon several Red Oaks engulfed in flames, a page directly from revelations torn straight from the bible to play out before me."
Which gets her captured, when she could have just waited. This is the only time I wanna punch Skylenna in the face. "I woke up in a cage. A cage like the one you lock your dog in when you're away." Bitch yes, you fucked around and found out instead of being patient. Dammit Skylenna!
Also, Albatross whatever the rest of his name is needs to back the fuck up, who in their right mind upon meeting someone for the first time says shit like: "You have curvier birthing hips in person than I would have guessed." Um, no, back up, gross. Also, shut up Albatross, don't say stupid shit, Skylenna hasn't been a part of your 'society' for a hot ass minute, and it isn't fascinating to watch the girl starve you deranged weirdo.
Ew, the wicked witch of Demechnef has arrived to measure Skylenna and just be mean as shit for no reason at all. Also, I need to understand why the Albatross dude mentioned Skylenna starving and what not but the wicked witch of Demechnef is literally shoving a tube down her throat to force feed her. Color me confused.
It turns out our friendly Jailor, Albatross can make Skylenna think (mentally without being touched or anything) that she has all these different aliments, like kidney stones, a broken collar bone and a lot of other things. Basically, this guy doesn't have to touch her to torture her which is terrifying. He wants to break her and make her doubt Dessin is coming for her or even that he cares for her at all.
At night she is able to mentally slip into a world of her own making called 'Ambrose oasis's'. Kane is there - a younger version of him - it helps her hold on to the remaining hope she has before she inevitability breaks because of this little snippet, "A fucking doll is a woman, near death, unable to more or speak. The soldier buries their cocks into her so they can think clearly when their hormones start to dominate their thoughts. Barbaric, isn't it? And to think your travel companion was by far the most gruesome-" - Albatross.
Skylenna, sadly begins to have some stalk home syndrome with our jailor Albatross. That is all before the wicked witch of Demechnef busts into the room screaming about people missing their heads. They take her to the panic room where there is a shit ton of security systems in place like a rock wall and poison.
Dessin is able to get through them which shows us Albatrosses face for the first time. It makes sense of why he was trying so hard to hide it from Skylenna as Dessin (previously known both Albatross and the wicked witch) carved his name into Albatrosses forehead before sewing his lips shut which left scaring around his mouth. Dessin kills them both, before rescuing Skylenna and getting her out of that hell hole.
Only for her to get upset with him and asking him why it took him four months to get her out of there. He is shocked and replies, "You thought you were in there for four months?" he weaves his hands into my dirty hair. "Skylenna, it took me four hours and thirteen minutes to save you. And I am ashamed it took us that long." This broke me even more, the hell she went through was shorted lived in reality but so impactful her mind couldn't handle time.
Skylenna is reunited with Ruth along with Niles and Chekiss which she hasn't seen for a while. I really enjoyed seeing them all get back together, and it made me hope it helps Skylenna overcome her trauma.
"I would like to vote Chekiss off the island." - Niles (Chekiss snores way to loud lol!)
We are introduced to another character that knows Dessin, named 'Warrose' who helps them kill well I am not really sure what they are. Anyways, Warrose and Dessin reconnect, get introduced to the group and they move on. This all happens before Skylenna decides it is time to ask about the formally mentioned fucking dolls since no one is answering any of her other questions.
"No? Okay, another questions. Who wants to explain to me fucking dolls that Demechnef used to offer the soldiers?" The aggressive intent comes pouring out of me like a volcanic eruption. I don't know what brought this anger on." Girl, I do! Dessin (or any of the alters for that matter) tell you jack shit that matters, I would be pissed as fuck if I was left in the dark ALL the time!
"How did you--"
"How could a stupid girl like me know about the fun activates you boys took part in?" Skylenna, babe yes breath that fire!
"You don't know what the fuck you're talking about!" Warrose is on his feet, towering over me like a great oak.
"Is it true? Am I at the very least entitled to know if I'm sleeping in a cave next to men that assault catatonic women?" - Skylenna. Yes, girl you are very entitled to that information!
"Jesus! We never took part in that!"
"No? So, Dessin wasn't the worst offender in Demechnef? Because that's what I heard." Skylenna.
"He was. Want to know why? Because any chance he got, he'd sneak into their rooms and slit their throats, so they didn't have to endure that abuse any longer! And for every woman he freed, he suffered weeks of blinding torment in the arena!" Warrose is clenching his fists glaring at me.
After so much time of Skylenna and Dessin learning to trust one another only to be broken because of creepo and the wicked witch is a sad thing to walk unfold. In the same seeing Niles break down was equally as hard to read. "I love you, Niles. You're my chosen brother in this life." I need another tissue great!
Shit! I nearly forgot the truth well half-truth bomb Kane/Dessin dropped on Skylenna! He has known her since she was TWO YEARS OLD! Bro like what?! That would have been nice to know idk like book one!
Anyways! Niklaus is an interesting character who unintentionally let's Skylenna in on a little secret. Not only is Demechnef hunting them but so are the Vexamen Breed. (Which we will have to my question board.)
NO!!! DaiSzek has been captured! Brandi girl, there is a like idk a handful of pages left before the book ends on what I am assuming will be another cliffhanger and you throw DaiSzek being captured at me!? Also does Dessin have a fucking death wish?
It turns out he does, and they turn themselves into the Demechnef headquarters. And guess the fuck what? We are bitch slapped into Sunday - you know what here, just read this and you will understand!
"You're back, I was worried I might have scared you away." That voice. That familiar, horrible voice. And those pale-blue eyes topped with black, perfectly arched eyebrows. The angelic porcelain face. The face that was once my friend. My only resource to starting my life over.
"What are - you doing - here?!" I stutter, clutching my hands to the cold hardwood floor.
"Skylenna..." Dessin's voice comes from above me. His hand squeezing the cap of my shoulder. "This is the leader of our country."
Silence. Cold claws cut into my spine and drag down my back. This isn't real.
Dessing clears his throat with disgust. "This is Aurick Demechnef."
I threw my book across the room just so you all know. This is book is a fucking prison on planet bullshit in the galaxy of this sucks camel dick! Why him? Why do I have to go into book three knowing that little bitch twat waffle is the leader of Demechnef?!